Learning to Wait and Psalm 27.

I remember when I was in high school, I would retreat to my bedroom and read my bible. I would find so much encouragement and strength just through reading God's word. I would come away with such closeness b/c his word was spoken and speaking directly to my heart. I struggled with a few things as a teenager that I could not really discuss with my parents. What is obvious now, is that I struggled with belonging and feeling valuable and being loved.

I should interject here a little history of my teen years. First off there were four of us kids. All within 5 yrs. I was a middle child with two older sisters and one younger brother. I had some previous learning problems yet was a good student and behaved well also. My oldest sister and brother both had problems in which took my mom's time and attention. I was pretty much aware of this and instead of leaning on her I leaned on God and a youth teacher who was like the "mom" of our youth group. I was not a popular person at school. I never had a boyfriend at school. I struggled with belonging and feeling valuable and being loved. Only slightly aware that I was more than valuable to God. I learned through youth group and camp that purity was important and a daily devotional was necessary to live a christian life. Communicating with the Lord was my most cherished moments as a teen. I have to confess here that my family was dysfunctional and many unnecessary things took place. Fights between my parents were a normal occurrence. I would often retreat to my bedroom and pray and read my bible in hopes to alleviate the arguing. One time I can recall singing praise songs in my room on my knees at my bed and my mom bursting into my room telling me, "stop that". I knew what I was doing at that point was not only right but bringing glory to God. It was not at all my desire to make my mom made but to find peace in the midst of a storm. In those years God was my peace.

Throughout my teen years I knew that my strength lied with my relationship with God / Jesus. I would find strength, hope and peace in reading my Bible, praying and praising Jesus. I knew whatever problem or struggle I had I could trust and rely on HIM.

Of all things now I recall those moments and a verse that I remember reading that uplifted me so much was found in Psalm 27 : 14 NAS version
Wait for the Lord;
Be strong, and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for the Lord.

Psalm 27 : 14 NKJ version
Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!

I always found it interesting that the "Wait on the Lord" part was repeated. Maybe b/c there in lies the secret of everything we desire or are anxious for. If we truly wait on the Lord w/ out being anxious or nagging in prayer but truly wait on God, all things will come to be.

I find myself at the threshold of this verse having to somewhat relearn what I so easily learned so many years ago. Wait on the Lord; take courage, He will strengthen your heart Yes wait on Me!

I know how loving our Heavenly Father is and can be. In the midst of uncertain times we can find confidence in his word. Not plagued with fears and doubts but faith and hope in what or rather who holds our future. Why is it though, if we already know this, that at times in our lives this remains a struggle?

God never says we are entitled to know what he has in store for us. Rather he said he will never leave us nor forsake us. I am glad not to know all the details b/c his presence is more than enough to foreshadow joy and hope. I still need to remind myself that a Daily Devotional and even a Praise Time are important. Even with the busy life of a mother, there should always be time for Jesus.

Are you making time to commune with God/ Jesus? It only takes a few minutes to lay your concerns before him in prayer. Then pick up your BIBLE and allow his spirit to feed into you the strength, hope, peace and joy that can only be found in walking daily with Jesus your LORD.